Because so many of you are so kind enough to ask, I want to update you on our adoption journey.
At times I wonder if I am sharing too much of our journey, but I am merely walking in fragile obedience here. And asking you for grace in doing so. It’s scary baring your heart to your computer screen. But I’m praying our transparency is an encouragement to someone else in their own adoption journey.
It turns out that what I thought would be a quick overnight road trip to adopt….is,well, in reality… a very lonnnnnng journey.
In fact, I would say most of what I assumed this adoption story would look like is not at all in reality how it is.
The hubby and I are in the middle of praying thru some hard stuff. What does one do when the Lord’s will doesn’t seem obvious? When there are so many ways to build your family….and yet you aren’t sure which way the Lord is asking you to do it thru?
We are still on a waiting list with 2 domestic adoption agencies in the US and will continue to wait on those. Our profile has been looked at several times, but has not been selected….and that is ok.
As we have been working thru the adoption process over the last year and a half….I have always said… “we will not do foster care unless the Lord changes my heart”.
Perhaps God heard that and accepted that as a challenge. LOL.
We are still thinking traditional foster care is NOT for our family, but we are slowly….literally inch by inch….thinking of adopting out of the foster care system. We would be specific about adopting a healthy little girl under the age of 4. Of this I am certain.
And I am scared.
I don’t need to tell you what I am scared of.
There are a jillion things to fear. Some realistic. Some just the jumbled fears that are coming out of a vain imagination.
I remind myself that I would have some of these same fears if we adopted an infant.
I would have some of these same fears if I were pregnant again.
Most of my fears are straight from the enemy himself and need cast down in the name of Jesus.
And so we are continuing to pray and ask that you would join us in doing so.
Adopting from the foster care system in our state essentially means redoing our home study. If ever you have adopted and have done a home study….you know what a daunting task this is. To think of redoing it physically makes my stomach hurt. If you don’t think it’s any big deal….I assure you….it’s because you have done a home study.
It would also mean 13 weeks of training for Jason and I. One night a week for 3 hours each week with 3 busy kids already and a booked calendar as it is. And HEAVY topics. Sad topics. Too many statistics and too many sad stories. It sounds like too much for an already crazy, busy household and a passionate momma’s heart.
I choose to believe however…… that if God brings us to it….He will give us grace to go thru it.
I am comforted lately by a daydream that I have had from the Lord. The Lord and I are holding hands and He is walking with me in the direction we are to go in our adoption journey.
And He knows I am scared.
And He knows my heart’s desire is to do His will.
And He loves on me like a patient daddy would his daughter. Knowing she will come around, but needing time to process.
And He is soooooooo patient with me.
So, we take a step together….the Lord and I. In a direction I have never been and completely out of my comfort zone.
And I need time to adjust my thinking.
To regroup mentally.
To timidly ask the Lord for the 100th time if He is certain He has the right girl here?????
I just have to get my head around what He is asking us to do.
I search for peace in my soul. And once I am there emotionally, then the Lord and I take another step and I remind myself that I can do ALL things thru Christ who strengthens me.
And so we continue, the Lord and I on this walk together.
I just LOVE that the Lord is never pushing me, never pulling me. Just gently by my side…..cheering me on. Reminding me over and over of His unfailing love for us. Reminding me of the scripture that if we ask for a fish, He will not give us a serpent because He is a GOOD GOD!
I am so grateful for my husband right now. For his wisdom and his peace and leadership in our home. I’m so grateful we are in agreement. And this is the direction he also feels we need to move in.
One of the adoption advocates who is supporting us has told me that most people will never consider adopting children out of the foster care system simply because of fear. He has encouraged us “to step over the threshold of fear”.
And I love that visual.
So please keep our family in your prayers as we continue to storm the throne of grace….eager to learn God’s will for our family. We are praying that if this the way to go, that the door would swing open wide. And if not, that before we spend 13 weeks in training….. the door would close tightly and another door would open.
I am so grateful for all of your emails and phone calls and blog comments. And I marvel that God has given me this blog as a place to work thru my emotions by writing and sharing our journey with the world. I am hoping I can encourage someone else who is also….doing it afraid.
Photo compliments of dear friend and talented photographer, Aimee Decker of Radiant Photography.
18 comments
Thank you for sharing your heart – I have tears in my eyes with the beautiful picture of your daydream. Prayers and love sent your way. XO Bev
Prayers for your family from Seattle. Stay strong, stay confident, stay focused on HIM and what he has spoke to you. Everything else is distration. We love you!
Thinking of you and your family: the fear, concern, joy, wants and love. Praying for strength and happiness for you. Keep up the fight and don’t forget to enjoy the journey!
I love hearing the update. I come from a family that fostered over 40 while I was growing up. We nearly adopted a set of 3 siblings but it didn’t work out in the end. I consider each and every one of them my brothers and sisters though. It was VERY HARD at times but SO REWARDING. If you have any questions on what it was like for a child going through the process of bringing a foster child into your space you are more than welcome to ask. You are in our prayers as well.
Your thoughts and words are exactly what I needed to hear. We are beginning the same journey. We are getting a room ready for a little girl right now. We hope to start the training in the next month or so. We are also looking to adopt from the foster care system. It is very scary, but at the same time I know God has plans for us. Our first child was adopted as an infant, our second was a “surprise”(after several years of infertility), and our third is somewhere waiting for us. I will be praying for your family…
Thanks for sharing your thoughts here – what a journey you are on, huh? Sounds like you are right where He wants you to be. Press on, sister.
Kelly
jennifer, you are so precious! God has a plan just for you. It is so hard to wait for that plan but it will be revealed to you. I will continue to pray for you and your family!!!! I love your heart! God will bless you!
Hi, I have a very good friend that publishes a Magazine called, Southern Child. A large topic in it is about adopting foster children.
The Magazine publishes an article in every issue on children that are waiting for their “forever” family. Please read about it at, http://www.southernchildmagazine.com/current-issue-2/… and http://www.fssjax.org/adoptchild.
Feel free to contact me if you have any questions. I have two Adopted Grand Chrildren, God has blessed us with so much Love. May you know the same Love.
Hi, I have a very good friend that publishes a Magazine called, Southern Child. A large topic in it is about adopting foster children.
The Magazine publishes an article in every issue on children that are waiting for their “forever” family. Please read about it at, http://www.southernchildmagazine.com/current-issue-2/… and http://www.fssjax.org/adoptchild.
Feel free to contact me if you have any questions. I have two Adopted Grand Chrildren, God has blessed us with so much Love. May you know the same Love.
Hi, I have a very good friend that publishes a Magazine called, Southern Child. A large topic in it is about adopting foster children.
The Magazine publishes an article in every issue on children that are waiting for their “forever” family. Please read about it at, http://www.southernchildmagazine.com/current-issue-2/… and http://www.fssjax.org/adoptchild.
Feel free to contact me if you have any questions. I have two Adopted Grand Chrildren, God has blessed us with so much Love. May you know the same Love.
Hi, I have a very good friend that publishes a Magazine called, Southern Child. A large topic in it is about adopting foster children.
The Magazine publishes an article in every issue on children that are waiting for their “forever” family. Please read about it at, http://www.southernchildmagazine.com/current-issue-2/… and http://www.fssjax.org/adoptchild.
Feel free to contact me if you have any questions. I have two Adopted Grand Chrildren, God has blessed us with so much Love. May you know the same Love.
Sending many prayers your way as you walk this road….you are brave and tough and STRONG….you can step over that threshhold….I know you will!
Lou Cinda
We have adopted 16 kids, 10 of those from foster care. If you feel God is leading you, go for it, but keep your eyes wide open and don’t think with your heart. These kids have usually been through some awful things and those things can rear their ugly heads at anytime in their lives. Which agencies are you using? Are you open to race? Someone I know (through the internet) used an agency out of Missouri and got two quick placments. My email is Robin4350AT YAHOODOTCOM if you would like to talk about adoption.
Everything happens for a reason…Right? I have always said how impressed I was with you guys and truly putting the PRO LIFE values and beliefs to work. Whatever child GOD has chosen for you, is going to be extremely lucky, as will you be. He has a plan and he knows what he is doing. The opportunity you are giving a child is amazing and I commend your entire family for it. I have seen so many children in the foster system that just need a chance, they need someone to believe in them and value them for the gift that they are, yet for one reason or another are overlooked. They need you just as much as you need them. I think of the movie The Blind Side often. Look at the difference in one mans life that a loving family, who took a chance made. Granted not the same circumstances, but unconditional love changed one mans entire world and path in life. God knows what he is doing.
Praying for your family. May God grant you the peace and graces you need!
I love that you are so brave to share.
I have a 9 year old foster son who has lived with my family for over two years. We love him, but simply can’t give him what he needs. He has just in the past two weeks met his adoptive family! We have too. They are already part of our family and we are so thankful that they chose to adopt out of the foster system. Our kiddo deserves all that this family will give him, that we just simply couldn’t. Thank you for considering this journey. If people like you weren’t out there, the little boy in my home wouldn’t be dreaming about his forever family tonight. 🙂 Blessings.
I have a 9 year old foster son who has lived with my family for over two years. We love him, but simply can’t give him what he needs. He has just in the past two weeks met his adoptive family! We have too. They are already part of our family and we are so thankful that they chose to adopt out of the foster system. Our kiddo deserves all that this family will give him, that we just simply couldn’t. Thank you for considering this journey. If people like you weren’t out there, the little boy in my home wouldn’t be dreaming about his forever family tonight. 🙂 Blessings.